love>?

I tend to have a weird viewpoint on relationships.  Maybe I'm afraid of commitment, or maybe, I'm just afraid.  Who knows? I love the feeling of being loved, and often times I attribute my over-compensation of searching for love to the lack of love I've received from my father.  I seem to fall into this strange pattern of only falling head-over-heals for the ones that I know I'll never have. As soon as I like someone, who in tern likes me, I lose that feeling.  I'm not sure why?  I'm afraid of being hurt, yes, because it's happened one time too much, but I'm also terrified of hurting others.. simply because I know how it feels.

I finally met someone, who, I know I can relate to in so many more ways than one. I know this person would sit and talk to me forever about anything I want to talk about--even if there's a lack of understanding or knowledge on their part. 

I often wonder, (and if you know me, you already know this) if I'll remain single forever. 

I miss love, but I hate it, too. I'm always in this constant battle with myself.  I kind of want to just focus on myself, because focusing on others is too much work.

Yet at the same time, I want to have someone to focus on. To compensate for my own issues that I don't want to pay attention to.

who knows.